Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Mental Grooves

This morning I was bouncing around everywhere but in the groove. My mental wheels were about to pop off from all the jumbling and jiggling. And I was not doing aerobics; I was just trying to get us ready for the day.

I learned from one of Jack's books on trains that the inspiration for train rails came from observing how a cart could travel easily through grooves worn into the road from carts who went before it. If it came out of the grooves, the trip would take longer and the cart would be more prone to damage from the rougher ride.

My rough ride today is due in part to the paradox of need. I've been thinking about paradoxes lately--I'm always so intrigued by them. In my motherly opinion, "NEED" is one of them--how amazing it feels to be needed, and how suffocating it can be sometimes.

Today my kids have been "needing" something at every turn--way more than usual. (Is it a full moon?) Sometimes I embrace the reality and love it--hello--I am their mommy. Other times, like today, I  feel unceasingly interrupted and it throws me from my happy groove of how I want to move through life.

This is what it looked like in my head. 

http://www.etsy.com/listing/70953507/cosmic-gate-1988-x-2000-modern-abstract
My nice spiral of thought, purpose and plans are all jumbled and broken. I can't THINK. I want to have a complete thought, but instead I fill another sippy cup, or answer another a question, or help someone pee.

This afternoon God helped my mental wheels get back into the smooth path. After school drop off, Nora and I went to the World Prayer Center to walk around. We've never done this together before, but today it suddenly occurred to me how lovely that would be to do with Nora. The sidewalk around the building is surrounded both by stunning front-range views and nice little places to sit and BE. We slowly walked, chatted, enjoyed the sunshine, and prayed. I prayed for our state, our country, the people suffering in Somalia. We went inside and read beautifully displayed scripture on prayer, listened to a guy playing piano, looked at flags from around the world and prayed for several countries.

This is my groove. Remembering to pray and worship, slow down and BE.

Now my brain looks more like this:

http://www.etsy.com/listing/71503683/sale-deep-sea-spiral-24-x-36-large-fine
Smooth, peaceful, restful.

As I'm finishing writing this my kids are happily playing with each other and not needing anything from me. I think when they ask me for something in a few minutes, my peaceful, in-the-groove self will jump at the opportunity to be needed.

Psalm 23:3--He refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for His name's sake. 


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Here's my idea for my blog that I'm crazy excited about! I am going to include artworks from artists I find on etsy.com or other places and use their pieces in my posts! I'll include the link so you can check them out and see their other works. One day, I'll include my own. :)
The artist I discovered today has an amazing story--go read it! http://www.etsy.com/people/AvantageuxArt


5 comments:

Cheri said...

love it! great reminder of how to get in the right groove too!

Jen said...

I really enjoy reading your blog! It's like sitting down with you for a delicious cup of coffee and good conversation. I miss you friend!

Jen B

Becca D said...

Thanks, girls! Jen, I miss you too! I hope you're having a great time still!

Tiffany said...

Thanks for this post! You are my supermom idol and it's nice to know that you feel that way too sometimes...that it's not always wonderful to feel needed!

I told Paul once that I might not be normal because I don't relish the idea that Katie NEEDS me, although like you say, sometimes it's WONDERFUL to know that I'm her mommy and I am the ONE she needs!

Glad to know that some days are like that and I love the idea of going to the prayer center with Katie. I'm taking that idea and using it!

Thanks!

Becca D said...

Tiffany--definitely go to the prayer center! So, wow--I'm humbled that you put me in the "supermom category" because I don't think of myself that way! There are so many things I wish I did better or more of in parenting, but it's nice to know you think highly of my parenting. :) Thanks for your kind words and sharing your thoughts!

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